Saturday, April 30, 2005

Thinking About The Impossible Crush

Joshilyn Jackson, of Faster than Kudzu, did a guest blog spot recently (on The Boyfriend List blog) called the Gradeschool Impossible Crush Boyfriend List. As with most of Joss's writing, it was hilarious. It got me thinking about my Gradeschool Impossible Crushes. Who were they? I'm told that when I was very small (pre-grade school, more like toddler age) I had a huge crush on Ilya Kuryakin of "The Man From U.N.C.L.E.". My mom said I'd lean on the TV and say "I love you Ilya". I don't remember doing it, but I don't doubt it. I DO remember having a mad crush on Robin, Batman's sidekick, in the old Adam West "Batman" series. Looking back on it, if I could go back in time and have a talk with my younger self I might try to gently explain to her that perhaps a young man who runs around in tights and has a butler who calls him "Master Dick" is not the best Crush Choice for a young girl. But at the time I thought he was dreamy. I used to pretend to be Dorothy from "The Wizard of Oz" ( I'm sure I chose her at least partly because of those sparkly ruby slippers) and I would make my childhood best friend pretend to be Robin who, in DebWorld, was not only Batman's sidekick, he was Dorothy's boyfriend. I have no idea why. I just thought they should get together. They (we!) would skip down the yellow brick road (made of paper or blankets or chalk on a sidewalk) singing "It's A Small World After All". Seriously. I couldn't make something that pathetic up. I also remember having a crush on Peter Tork from "The Monkees". While most of the other girls were swooning over Davy, I only had eyes for Peter and his dimples. I still have kind of a thing for dimples. But these days I appreciate brains to go with them. And I'm right there with Joshilyn in her crush on Mr. Spock from "Star Trek". Who the heck didn't have a crush on Mr. Spock at some point? What girl growing up in that era didn't think that if only Mr. Spock met her, he would finally feel love and, by golly, he'd LIKE it! Hhmmm....in writing this I'm noticing a theme. I always swooned over the sidekick/second-in-command instead of the star, didn't I? I have no idea what that means, but I find it interesting. Maybe I didn't want the star because I was too busy BEING the star in my own imagination, skipping down the yellow brick road in my sparkly, ruby-red slippers.